I'm not good at saying "No"

I'm a Yes person.  Sure I can help. Absolutely, you can count on me.  Why not?  I've found that lately my desire to help out or pitch in has been to the detriment of my family and more importantly, to my laundry. 

I have been inspired by my painter to start a list of readily available and scripted excuses for why I can't do things.  Maybe if I just had a list nearby, it would be easier to get out of stuff.  My painter has a list as long as his arm of excuses.  Here are some that I've heard lately:

My daughter was sick and I had to get her from school

A tree trimmer got his truck stuck in my driveway.  He got unstuck by 11am, but by then, I had started to clean the garage

I have another job that is bigger than yours

I'm feeling foggy today

So, I need some more excuses for my arsenal.  What are some of your go-to's?